Advice For The New Year

Advice For The New Year

Always do right. This will gratify some people
and astonish the rest....Mark Twain

Always keep your words soft and sweet,
just in case you have to eat them.

Be like a postage stamp -
stick to one thing until you get there.

Be true to your teeth, or they'll be false to you.

Be wary of strong drink.
It can make you shoot at tax collectors, and miss.

 

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes.
That way you're a mile away, and you have their shoes too.

 

Cooking lesson #1: don't fry bacon in the nude.

  

Drive carefully.
It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

Eat a live toad in the morning and nothing worse
will happen to you for the rest of the day.

Eat your spinach and you'll grow up big and strong like Popeye.
You'll also end up with a girlfriend that looks like Olive Oyl.

 

Growl all day and you'll be dog tired at night.

 

If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!

 

If you and your friend are being chased by a grizzly bear,
don't worry about out-running the bear,
just worry about out-running your friend.

 

If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again,
it was probably worth it.

 

If you think nobody cares if you're alive,
try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think your wife's jewelry is an investment,
try selling a few pieces.

 

It is better to keep your mouth shut,
and look like a fool, than to open your mouth,
and remove all doubt.

 

It's nice to be important,
but more important to be nice.

 

It's always darkest before dawn. a
So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper,
that's the time to do it

 

Take the time to be right.
It's faster than being wrong.

The easiest way to find something lost around
the house is to buy a replacement

 

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody is looking.

Source: Mamarocks.com

The Wreath Is On The Door

The Wreath Is On The Door

The wreath is on the door
And the snow is on the tree
God has laid His holy hands
On all that we can see.

Be quick to raise your voice
And praise what He has brought.
Keep now His love in every choice
And Christmas in every thought.

Merry Christmas

Family Ties

Family Ties are precious things
Woven through the years,
Of memories of togetherness,
Of laughter, love and tears.

Family Ties are cherished things,
Forged in childhood days,
By love of parents, deep and true,
By tradition, by family ways.

Family Ties are treasured things
And far though we may roam,
The tender bond with those we love
 Still pulls our heart towards home.

Author Unknown

Source: mamarocks.com

Memphis' Incredible Pizza To Add Indoor Roller Coaster

Click Here to check out this news at Channel 5 News.

Source: wmcactionnews5.com

The Story Of A Son Who Hated His Father

A young man was getting ready to graduate college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer’s showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.

As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautiful wrapped gift box.

Curious, but somewhat disappointed the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible. Angrily, he raised his voice at his father and said, “With all your money you give me a Bible?” and stormed out of the house, leaving the holy book.Many years passed and the young man was very successful in
business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. 

He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care things. When he arrived at his father’s house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart.

He began to search his father’s important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. As he read those words, a car key dropped from an envelope taped behind the Bible. 

It had a tag with the dealer’s name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words…

PAID IN FULL.

How many times do we miss God’s blessings because they are not packaged as we expected?

Source: bestenglishquotes4u.com

Have You Ever Noticed:

If you are doing something messy, like kneading dough or working on
the car....your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

If you drop something small like any tool, nut, bolt, screw, thimble, thread,
needle it will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.

The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.

If you dial a wrong number,
you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.

If you change lines in a store or lanes on the highway,
the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.

When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES
dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle,
always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times
to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end
of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats
come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies
and stay to the bitter end of the performance. 

The aisle people also are very surly folk.

As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor,
are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

As soon as you find a product that you really like,
they will stop making it, OR the store will stop selling it!!

If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor,
by the time you get there you'll feel better..
But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.